Mt Whitney Zone Forums The Chat Room Where Are the Silly Jokes?

Justin Broadbent-Johnston the Third was in his doctor's waiting room. He had waited for almost two whole minutes, and was begining to become irritated. After all, he has paid atrociously high fees to the medical group for many years, and as a very highly paid corporate Chairman, he values his time accordingly.

Just then a vision passed through the office! A short lady with freckles, dimples, lubricous curves and a neverending mane of brilliantly vibrant, thick red hair glided though, wearing a white coat!

Seconds later, in his doctor's office, Justin asked his doctor for her name. Her name is Cynthia Nyes, his doctor said, she's recently separated from Lord Stitts, and she has just joined our group as a specialist, and is half your age. So Justin, having just ditched his fourth wife, said "I'd give anything to meet her". Well, the doc stated, we have some blood tests from you that indicate that you need to consult with her in her specialty. Friday next week at 10:30 am. Can you do that? Oh yes! Oh yes! Oh yes!

So Justin, comprehensively blind to the medical situation, stands in front of the mirror at home. He's not all that tall, but Cynthia is short, and he has some eelskin cowboy boots with elevated heels. Not a problem. He's actually fairly handsome, but a little pale from living indoors. That can be fixed, he thinks, do the tanning bed thing for an hour. So he has his assistant make an appointment. Teeth - just perfect. On to his hair, which is pale blonde, noticeably thinned. Really thinned. Realistically, he's bald. What would a red-haired Cynthia lady really be looking for, he thinks? Red is just too competitive, Brunette doesn't match, so he makes an appointment with his salon to have a thick, platinum blonde wig made specially for him. Almost shoulder-length, but not anywhere near as long as Cynthia's - that would just not be cool.

On Wednesday, he spends an hour frying in the tanning booth. Hamiltonian results. I've won her!, he thinks to himself.

So now it's Thursday, & Justin is off to the salon for a fitting. The wig is stunning. He stands tall and accepts the compliments of the salon staff. He doesn't bow, because that would be beneath his station in life. He's going to win her!

And now it's Friday. He's twenty minutes early for his appointment. She keeps Justin waiting 15 minutes past his appointment time. Not a problem, he's in love!. Then another delay - no problem.

Finally he's in her office. Why? - because he has a very high prostate specific antigen count and she is a proctologist.

So he follows her instructions. Down with the pants. And the undies. She slaps on the rubber gloves, asks him to bend over... more... more.. And, mortifyingly, his hairpiece flops on the floor!.

Not to worry, she said, it is just adverse hair piece stance.