Wagga, while this may be true, it may also be true that the hysterics were caused by people seeing that your nipple rings were caught in your beard, which reminds me that many of us over 50 - WAY over 50 - are quite confused about how we should present ourselves. We're unsure about the kind of image we are projecting and whether or not we are correct as we try to conform to current fashions.
And for those of you reading this who are nowhere near 50 yet, keep reading anyway, you'll be there.
Despite what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations DO NOT go together and should be avoided:
1. A nose ring and bifocals
2. Spiked hair and bald spots
3. A pierced tongue and dentures
4. Miniskirts and support hose
5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads
6. Speedos and cellulite
7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar
8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor
9. Midriff shirts and a midriff bulge
10. Pierced nipples that hang below the waist
11. Bikinis and liver spots
12. Short shorts and varicose veins
13. In-line skates and a walker
And the ultimate 'Bad Taste' in fashion:
14. A thong and Depends
Please keep these basic guidelines foremost in your mind when you shop so you do not cause a hysterical scene in the store and on the streets.
